Monday, May 9, 2011

Disconsolately Despairing

I am heartbroken. Inconsolable. Crushed. Desolate. Grief-stricken.

I accidentally erased all the text messages from my inbox. Some of these were very meaningful. I had the first text my MI mom ever attempted. The first text my WA momMA ever sent. I had sweet notes, ILU notes, funny notes, oops notes. Messages I scrolled through and read when I was sitting in a restaurant by myself or in the Dr.'s waiting room. Messages I would read at night before I went to bed if I wanted a nice laugh or a warmed heart. They are all gone. How did I do that?

In a strange way, I feel relief. I have tried so hard for so long to keep them safe that it became almost an obsession. Now, as dismaying as it is, they are gone. I don't have to worry about them anymore. There is nothing I can do. MI mom and WA momMA will have to send new notes to replace my favorites. Maybe I can teach myself to erase them as they come in instead of hoarding them for years.

Monday, thou art not my favoritest of days.

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